What’s been keeping me (relatively) sane for the past few months: katrina alaia, rach, the sirens, live jazz at steamer’s cafe, tapioca milk tea with boba, the new bright eyes album, grey’s anatomy, random doodles, God’s promises, and oddly enough, a billboard off the 60 freeway containing one word: Thrive.

“I don’t… I just… That day you came out of the water… I was trying to breathe for you. I love you, and I want you, but I don’t know what to… You didn’t swim. You didn’t swim and you know how to. And I don’t know if I can… I don’t know if I want to keep trying to breathe for you.” -Derek Sheppard to Meredith Grey.

Determined to give up on someone(in one aspect), whom I told myself I’d never. But when all you hear are guilty half-truths, and when every ounce of an individual is so insincere you can taste it, you just know that they may not be worth it in the long run. I hope that you prove me wrong. This world isn’t your home; please acknowledge that. I know this life is a struggle, but it’s a struggle for everyone else as well. The thing is, as people, we’ve got choices. And as a Christian, YOU HAVE GOD. YOU have the upper-hand. In fact, WE’RE PROMISED THE VICTORY. And you know that you know all this. As always, you’re in my prayers. You can keep re-living your mistakes, if that’s what it takes. As for me, I’m learning from mine. And with that said, this is my goodbye to any future I would’ve hoped to have with you as more than just friends.

Smile and show your teeth, sweetie. You got your wish.