she has been, and will always be — the entertainment of my life hahaha

note: phone conversation consisted of 90% laughter, 5% inaudible dialogue because of said laughter, and eventually 5% of our short stories being told

01. across the universe soundtrack – girl
02. aj rafael & jesse barrera – she was mine
03. anjulie – love songs
04. she & him – why do you let me stay here
05. tilly and the wall – rainbows in the dark
06. coldplay – life in technicolor ii
07. rilo kiley – portions for foxes
08. snow patrol – chocolate
09. adele – daydreams
10. a tribe called quest – can i kick it
11. india.arie – can i walk with you
12. musiq soulchild – just friends (beat box mix)
13. tupac feat. nas – thugz mansion (acoustic)
14. nevershoutnever – trouble

everything i want to say right now isn’t appropriate, and may never be heard.

01. castledoor – dumpster diving
02. bright eyes – the first day of my life
03. feist – mushaboom
04. dan black – hpntze
05. nujabes – feather
06. binary star – reality check
07. fleet foxes – white winter hymnal
08. kevin devine – alabama acres
09. cavil at rest – who knows, who cares
10. priscilla ahn – are we different
11. kings of leon – use somebody
12. the wonders – that thing you do (live at the hollywood television showcase)
13. imogen heap – hide and seek

(500) days of summer

August 13, 2009

with rachel dejesus


August 10, 2009

well, i wrote your name and burned it to see the color of the flame, and it burnt out the whole spectrum, as if you were everything. mine just burned gold, a normal flame. i am not anything. and all that i remember is the feeling of waking up. we were kids, i was the sun to which your eyes would not adjust. we were kids, you were a fountain; i could never drink enough. then came all the boys that swept you up, and played careless with your heart. and every night there was a new girl sitting beside me in my car. something dies when you grow older, but you do the best you can. i am glad, i am glad you found a good man.

music: local natives/cavil at rest, bon iver, eisley, the fray, kina grannis, wilco, fleet foxes, of montreal, broken social scene, death cab for cutie, explosions in the sky, she & him, passion pit, incubus, tilly and the wall, matt costa | film (trailers): 500 days of summer, away we go, where the wild things are; watch these movies with me | books: hp and the deathly hallows, the time traveler’s wife, dibs in search of self, the perks of being a wallflower, | other: pencil and small notebook sketches of actual people; might add it to my drawings blog, walks around the neighborhood, random polaroids, ipods, pebbles

feeling so tired of everyone around me. everything’s pretty harrowing currently, and putting total confidence in an individual isn’t the same if it isn’t reciprocated which is why i haven’t as of late. i’ve always felt like there were certain people that i could turn to, but gradually understanding that that really isn’t always the case. for some reason, we’re all incapable of spilling our guts, of opening ourselves up. making inane small talk on long drives, walking past each other in hallways, nodding glassy-eyed; what a sad state. as always, wanting to type “leaving it all in His hands”, but have you ever reiterated that to yourself so many times that it gets to the point of saying it just to get through the day? i know God is good and i trust in His promises, but i’m still praying inten(t/se)ly that my head and heart are nothing less than genuine.

am i the only one who feels this way