R.I.P. Robin Williams

August 12, 2014

“O Captain! My Captain! Rise up and hear the bells. Rise up, for you the flag is flung, for you the bugle trills.”

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shit to blog about

August 8, 2014

Sdcc, Christianity, Nick Thune on You Made It Weird, Guardians of the Galaxy, insensitivity, etc.

social networking woes

July 20, 2014

All Facebook does is remind me that Kari-Anne’s baby is hella fucking cute. Self-loathing and loneliness calls for wine and Ferrero Rochers. But that’s also my reward for self-loving, so idk.

discouragement blog

July 10, 2014

Haha, this blog (my previous blog – hashtags and ampersands) was supposed to help me delve deeper into the positive and optimistic aspects of my life and way of thinking, but all it’s really doing is revealing more and more the cynical, jaded, and realist side of me — so we’ll just go with that from now on instead of isolating certain ideas into “good thoughts” and “bad thoughts” categories. Hoping that my life inspires writing that IS hopeful and happy, but ultimately I just want to write, as genuinely as possible, because honestly, who’s going to read and reflect on this drivel except for me.

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Had an amazing getaway from Los Angeles: SF consisted of scenic road trips, puppies (Winston), pork bellies, airBnB, long walks, bridges, bars, Bart, sharing tables/conversation at La Boulange with a nice older lady, and hilariously getting drunk off sangria with the sis and bro-in-law. Part one of SB consisted of train rides, beaches, downtowns, more pork bellies (plus other amazing foods), more bars, more long walks, wine tastings, photography, relaxation, reflection, and one Tinder meet up with a gorgeous young lady named Alexandra, then getting high off weed (and oxygen) on my balcony while conversing about everything and nothing in particular. My one regret was not hooking up with her when I definitely could’ve (as proven by text messages afterward, haha.) Part two with Katrina, Daniel, and Bic was incredibly wholesome yet equally as fun, filled with inside jokes, selfies, and laughter. It was a good vacation.

musicspirituality

June 16, 2014

I listen to the musicality and lyrical content of hardcore bands like Thrice or Being As An Ocean or The Beautiful Mistake, and I constantly find myself moved and motivated to live a more spiritual life — or at least continue my search for the Father/Creator/Savior God that THEY revere. Their lyrics, their struggles in life, their hope, and their loving God seem more real than what I’ve heard in most Christian music for some reason.

practicality vs. dreams

February 12, 2014

Life is really weird lately. Like a really good, yet difficult weird. I turn 30 tomorrow (shudder) and you’d think that all the big decisions I would’ve had to make would’ve been decided before this point. Or that certain options would no longer be available so I’d be free to live out the rest of my days comfortably and routinely. Of course, such is not the case. Hoping and praying I don’t blow this/these shot/s.

water colors

February 10, 2014

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Learned to properly watercolor tonight. I’m feeling accomplished and happy to have found a new medium to express my ideas and creativity. Hopefully I’ll get to do it often.

Photo cred: Tesia

enjoy your burrito

February 2, 2014

“Enjoy your burrito” is a phrase that’s said at the end of every Nerdist podcast, but it wasn’t until last November that I finally found out what it actually meant. I stumbled upon Nerdist podcast #39 (The most current podcast is #473) featuring Rainn Wilson, who plays Dwight Schrute on the Office and is the creator/founder of Soul Pancake.

Hilarity and ridiculousness is littered throughout the podcast, but spirituality, contentment, and happiness — the different types of happiness, how to attain it, the definition of it in modern culture, etc. — eventually become the topic. Rainn speaks of a profound type of happiness, a connectedness that he’s not expecting or sometimes even aware of. He mentions past happiest moments, one for example, fishing with his son. He didn’t know it was one of the happiest moments in his life at the time; this was a realization in retrospect. There were so many interesting and substantial moments regarding this podcast: How do you connect particular dots in life to achieve that final product, to attain a type of “human flourishing”, a constant learning and growing experience of well-being?; among others.

At the 00:56:06 mark, Jonah Ray (one of the Nerdist co-hosts) talks about moving to LA from Hawaii to pursue acting and comedy, but unfortunately finding very few opportunities for work. At this point, he wasn’t moving forward career-wise and felt depressed because of his current situation.

He’d go to his favorite burrito place for lunch — After eating half of his burrito, he’d get disappointed because the burrito was almost finished, and he’d have to go back to his depressing life. So he created for himself a thought process: Yes, the burrito is almost done, but it isn’t done yet, it’s still here, you still have it. Enjoy it. Enjoy the present. We’re always waiting for the next thing to happen. But don’t let expectations or things that might happen take away from what you’re happy with in this moment.

Enjoy your burrito one bite at a time, then apply that mindset to whatever comes next.

Will edit later… Date night with Tesia. Sonic. Frozen. Steamer’s. Sinners. Amazing philosophical and nonsensical conversations. A really good night.

text message break-ups

October 5, 2012

So I tried to cut off Katrina the other night through text, for various personal reasons. But I’m thinking she caught on and won’t let it happen. She’s now interested in just about every facet of my life. But I don’t want that. She wants to continue being friends, except now she’s going to omit certain things, and I think that’s worse than not talking at all. Maybe phasing out will work better than cutting off. Going with her to see Perks tonight in Brea though, we’ll see how that goes.

“But the world is so full of people , so crowded with these miracles that they become commonplace and we forget… I forget.

We gaze continually at the world and it grows dull in our perceptions. Yet seen from another’s vantage point, as if new, it may still take the breath away.” 

Dan Harmon, about Community

September 11, 2012

“This is a show about broken people. All of them are quite alone, some involuntarily, some by their own hand, some without realizing it, but none of them come to the study room table with the emotional advantages held by that mythical creature known as ‘a normal person.’ There are no normal people, there are just different kinds of weird, all of it is human and all humanity is better than everything inhuman.”

honesty hour

August 8, 2012

Avengers Youth Camp was a blessing, although I never quite know what to do with that spiritual high. A part of me knows that that’s exactly what it is — something temporary if not built upon — and as much as I want to at least gain momentum from that, it’s hard to keep it consistent. I guess that’s where prayer should come in. Matters of the heart and gray areas and Christian freedoms and this obligation (though it shouldn’t be) to have to live a certain way can be so confusing though. And it isn’t a question at all who I should pray TO, it’s just the fact that I don’t even know what to pray FOR anymore. I know I’m blessed, I know my faith is solid. It’s just a weird time for me right now and as I’m reading Crazy Love, I kind of despise the fact that I might be taking advantage of this Grace. And I also despise the fact that I’m not really taking that last fact as motivation to change.

Sidenote: Oh, and PCC BP, just when I’m starting to miss you, you give me so many reasons not to. Anyway, that’s all.

btm bonfire 2012

July 9, 2012

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More photos from this set HERE.

independence day blurb

July 6, 2012

Ok, best 4th of July ever. EVER.

Katrina Alaia, drive to Brea, closed favorite restaurants in Fullerton and Diamond Bar, Chickfila, Ontario Mills with Tita Cyn, plus Steph, Dan, Ron Tua, Barbecue, Vantage Point, driving through the streets of La Puente following the sights and sounds of fireworks and finding the biggest and most dangerous ones in the residentials (tha hood, haha), gangsta rap switched to KOST, 10pm ice cream trucks, dead battery ice cream trucks, jump starting an ice cream truck, getting free ice cream in return, and fireworks on the way back, all with amazing, amazing company. Good day, I didn’t even have to use my AK.